Happy Valentine’s Day!

Ah yes, it’s the month of love. And for those going through a divorce, the entire month of February can be a minefield of emotional ups and downs.

Valentine’s Day seems to bring out either the romantic or cynic in all of us. Sometimes it seems like everywhere you look there are reminders of couples, happy times, and fairytale romance. This is often amplified if you’re recently single and still adjusting to your new relationship status. It can all be quite overwhelming and bring on emotions you weren’t expecting.

Yes, it’s true that the month of love can be a tough one for those going through a divorce, but you can stay out of overwhelm, hold your head high, and navigate the minefields with ease.  

Here’s how to keep calm and carry on this February:

1.     Celebrate all of the love and support in your life

Rather than focus on the one person or relationship that may be missing right now, focus on the abundance of love all around you. Love shows up in our lives in many forms – from our children, parents, friends, pets, etc. Look for the love and support that other people in your life are providing for you right now and appreciate all of the various ways love shows up in our lives. There’s much more love out there than the romantic kind we typically focus on around Valentine’s Day. Your relationship status may say single, but you are far from alone.

2.     Stay away from regret

Remember that no relationship in our lives is a waste of time. Each serves a purpose and brings many lessons along with the ride. On a typical day, you may feel comfortable with your decisions and settled in your new life, but the big focus on couples today can send anyone into a tailspin of second-guessing choices and feeling regretful about past decisions. Remain true to yourself and respect the decisions you’ve made along the way. It’s easy to get caught up in the feelings of one day, but your decision to get divorced is about much more than one day a year. If you find yourself falling down this slippery slope, remember that the relationship had a start and end date for a reason.

3.     Give yourself extra time and space

Healing is a process that doesn’t follow a linear route. What worked for one, doesn’t necessarily work for another. Perhaps you just filed for divorce in January and are working on rebuilding your single life. Valentine’s Day can sneak up on you and you find yourself feeling a bit down. Take this day to celebrate you! Give yourself some special time alone and the space to focus on your relationship with yourself. This relationship is the most important and it’s easy to forget. Get a massage, enjoy a delicious meal, or zone out with a movie marathon. Do whatever you need to nurture yourself and celebrate the best relationship you have.

Don’t let the month of love derail you. Celebrate you this Valentine’s Day! Your choices, the love around you, and the love you have for yourself. Enjoy yourself and follow these tips to navigate February with ease.