Amidst all the busy-ness of the holidays, we can easily forget the purpose of the holiday season. For some of us, it is a time to reflect on the past year, giving thanks for the good and making a commitment to change what isn't working. For others it is a time to celebrate our faith and honor traditions of our families. Whatever your purpose is, it is important to find peace. Peace isn't just for the holidays, but it is something that we all need, all the time. I see families changed by divorce and their lives can tend to be filled with tension and difficulty. These families need peace more than ever.

Divorce impacts everyone. It has a ripple effect from the couple that is divorcing all the way out to their children, grandchildren, friends, extended family and co-workers. It does truly change people, but that doesn't mean it can change a person for the better. Learning to be peaceful during conflict is a practice. What better time than to practice this than during the holiday season. Here are some ways to find more peace this holiday season:

  • Spend some time outside - Go outside and get to know nature. Appreciate the good around you. Take in the sights, smells and sounds. Research shows that going outdoors reduces stress levels and improves health.
  • Say you are sorry - You are not a coward if you say "sorry". We all make mistakes and it take courage to admit them and learn from them. If you have strife in a relationship, you can apologize. Though the other person may not forgive or let things go, you are at least doing your part to bring more peace into your life.
  • Offer forgiveness - We spend much of our time during a divorce in resentment and anger. This is a part of grieving but accepting the situation is also a part of that process. Forgiving the person can free up your mental energy towards something positive in your life that you want to do.
  • Do something that makes you happy - Joy brings us peace. What do you love to do during the holidays? Not sure? Try something new or bring back an old tradition to life. 
When it comes to divorce, there is a calm after the storm. Wherever you are at in the process, may this holiday remind you that your life will and can get better. May you be filled with peace and happiness this season.